two sisters against the world

I'm going to deviate from my usual shocking/crazy storytelling for this one. I hope it will still be an entertaining story, but instead of telling you about some psycho kid or just crazy wild incident (don't worry, there are plenty more of those to come), I'm going to tell a tamer, yet sadder story that still fits into the theme of being totally out of my element.

About halfway through the year, Mrs. Campbell and I each acquired a new student on the same day. They were sisters, but not twins. I think they were about 11 months apart. Or maybe 13. Either way, Sandra (in my class) was in 3rd grade for the second time, and Jamie (Mrs. Campbell's homeroom) was a first time 3rd grader. Both girls were sweet, both participated in class, both were good students, although Sandra had a harder time with the academics. Sandra in particular, maybe because she was in my homeroom, became very attached to me pretty quickly. She always wanted to help me do "teacher stuff," and she always wanted to hug me and talk to me outside of class.

This did not mean that the girls were without their issues. Jamie, whom I had first thing in the morning, would often fall asleep in class to the point she could barely be woken up and then would drift off again almost immediately. Sandra's non-academic problems were that she was quick to fight, and although she made friends easily, she was almost always involved in girl drama and had a few enemies too. None of these qualities were really out of the ordinary for many of my students.

As a teacher, you bond with some students more than others. It just happens that way; looking back on last year, there are students I think I should've connected with more, but it just didn't happen or didn't come naturally for whatever reason. You can't expect to form special connections with everyone, in anything that you do. But I bring this up to say that I did connect with Jamie and Sandra, particularly Sandra. Maybe I felt like she needed me. She was one that actually allowed me to talk problems out with her and then would try to work on whatever the issue was. Jamie, on the other hand, would completely shut down when she was having a bad day.

The sisters were often late for school. One morning sometime in the spring, I was standing in my classroom doorway, as I usually did during the morning announcements as the students were still coming in, and Sandra rounded the corner at the top of the stairs and came marching down the hallway toward me, nearly out of breath.

She walked right up to me and said, "Ms. T, I have to talk to you."

I pulled her aside and said, "Ok, what's going on?"

She took a deep gulp of air. "This morning, my mom's friend punched me and my sister in our hearts." She pointed to the center of her chest.

"Slow down," I said. "Is your mom's friend staying with you?"

She nodded.

I'll be honest. I had no idea what to do. I know that, obviously, as a teacher, I am legally bound to report any suspected abuse to the appropriate authorities. But in the real world, sometimes it's hard to determine what the situation actually is - what the truth is. But I guess in these cases, that's not my job. A child discloses something to me; it needs to be properly investigated. Better safe than sorry.

So basically, I knew I had to report this, but I had never been told how to go about doing that. At this exact moment, the counselor walked by.

"Mrs. Adams," I said. "Can you come here for a minute?"

I asked Sandra to tell Mrs. Adams what she had told me. We were then able to get Jamie as her class was lining up in the hallway, and she told the same story Sandra had.

"So this lady's been staying at your house?" Mrs. Adams asked the girls. "Has she done things like this before?"

Both girls nodded.

"Why haven't you told your mom about this?" she asked.

The girls looked at each other. "We don't see our mom because she goes to work," Jamie said.

"Hmm," said Mrs. Adams. Now, I know this is at least partially untrue because both girls would often talk about their mother. Mama said this, Mama said that. Mama said we're going here or there after school today. But maybe she had gotten a new job, I don't know.

Mrs. Adams then escorted the girls downstairs to see the nurse, to talk to them further, and to call their mom.

During my planning time a couple of hours later, I learned that the mom had been contacted and said this was the first she'd heard that this was going on. Both girls had visited the nurse twice complaining of chest pain and seemed shaken up, causing the nurse to at least tell Mrs. Adams she was going to file a report herself. I asked Mrs. Adams if we both needed to report the incident, and she said it was up to me but that since I was the one Sandra chose to tell, it wouldn't be a bad idea. So I filed two separate reports, one on each girl.

This occurred on a Tuesday. That Thursday, both girls were absent from school. It wasn't uncommon for one of them to miss school, but for both of them to miss at the same time was unusual. I worried about them all day. I thought nothing good could be happening. Of course I wanted what was best for them, even if that meant them being removed from their mother. Anyone with a brain and half a soul knows that's the best solution sometimes. But it's a really hard thing to swallow when you're actually watching something like this happen, when you know the people involved. I never meant the girls' mom in person, and from my phone conversations with her, it seemed like her intentions were in the right place. But who knows? It's just hard to say, ok, the best thing is for these kids to be taken from their home and be put who knows where when you know that's not what they would choose for themselves.

Anyway, they weren't removed from their home. I don't know what happened when the situation was investigated. The girls were back at school the next day. Sandra seemed unusually quiet and subdued. When I asked her if everything was ok, she shook her head.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked.

She shook her head no.

I don't know if the girls put two and two together that we reported what they had told us to the authorities, and I hope that if they did, it doesn't discourage them from seeking help from adults when something is wrong. My relationship with the sisters didn't really change between then and the end of the year, but I did always try to keep a close eye on them after that and I still think about them often. It kind of seems like two sisters against the world.