First of all, can we at least once please see a tale of a girl who doesn't end up with a guy? Why does the guy even have to be a part of the equation? In real life, very few personal quests a woman can go on de facto end up with getting a boyfriend and riding off into the sunset. I realize that love stories sell movie tickets, but what about those of us who aren't secretly bombshells under our freakiness? What about those of us who choose to embrace the freedom of being single, rather than see it as some unfortunate thing that happened to us? Why don't we get stories to relate to? When people see single guys, they tend to assume it's a choice. He's enjoying being a bachelor. He doesn't want to be tied down. When they see a single girl, they pity her. They tell her not to worry, she'll find someone. He's out there. You know what? Maybe he's not. And that's okay. I AM ENOUGH. And I refuse to consider anyone else when defining myself.
Another reason, other than romance (and sex) sells, I think these stories are perpetuated is that on some level, there are true elements to them. I know, that kind of contradicts everything I just said. But let me explain. I have easily the most inactive love life of all of my friends. I always have. I wish I had learned to be okay with that a lot sooner, but my point is that I watch quite literally all of my friends date, get noticed, get flirted with, have relationships, get married, etc., etc. And it's never me (although it is true that when I'm being flirted with, I don't usually even notice). Not only do my friends not realize this (I kind of think that they, like me, think it's just not possible for me... wow, I am being REALLY honest right now), but I don't think they could handle it if it were them. They don't know what it's like for love (well, romance... sex, whatever) not to be in the picture. I don't how else to put it, but they just don't get it. (And if you're reading this, don't tell me that you do--you don't. Press me on this and I'll get even more detailed as to why you don't).
So, getting back to my point about literature, it is my feeling that if my friends, and other girls, saw a movie, read a book, whatever, with a female lead, where there was no love story, they would be like, "where was the love story? Why didn't she meet a guy? She deserved to meet a guy. You know what would've made that better? A love story with a hot guy!" Ick. Again, why are we qualifying her success, her life, her happiness with love?
So for all of the work that our women's liberation movement predecessors did (and they did a whole hell of a lot), I don't think we're truly liberated until we can see our lives totally independent of men (I realize that we live in a co-ed world, and that's a good thing, but I'm talking about how we see ourselves looking inward). And when that happens, it will be reflected in literature and art.
Let me also make clear that I am not a man-hater. I respect and am friends with many dudes. I just want to be seen, valued and treated independently of men. I don't have anything against getting married, having babies, or having relationships. I don't really have anything against people who make those choices being represented in art. I would just like to see something I could relate to, for once. I can't be the only one.
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